snagabag

Ok everyone. Prepare for some pure, unadultered humor. You don’t get this kind of humor very often.

Aparna & I were in Corpus last weekend, and I spotted this in the kitchen:

In case you aren’t familar with Fleet, and the name ENEMAN isn’t clear enough, then please, let me clear up any confusion. This stuffed toy is a superhero in the form on a ENEMA!!! (Now that would’ve been an interesting Wonder Twins Power)

Marketing types at Johnson & Johnson are definitely taught to think outside the box.

Really, seeing this thing wasn’t the most hilarious aspect. No, there was a tie for the funniest thing I’ve seen or heard in 2005:

• Bless the innocence of youth. Anila believes this to be some goofy guy with a carrot for a hat.
• Okay, I lied. Nothing was funnier than when Aparna’s dad picked up Eneman, tilted him forward at a slight downward angle, and gave him a few squeezes. Oh man… too funny.

Yes, I did want to take EneMan to give to our soon-to-be-born daughter, but Anila did not want to part with her carrot hat toy.

Nevertheless, I have decided that our daughter will only have non-traditional stuffed toys.(*)

(*)Aparna has decided that is a stupid idea and thus it will not be implemented.(**)

(**)This outcome applies to every parenting “idea” I’ve come up with so far.

So Bush and Republicans signed a bill into law aimed at one person. Of course, it had to be done because every life is too valuable to give up on, right?

Wrong. (At least if you’re George W. Bush)

• Bush signed a law in Texas that expressly gave hospitals the right to remove life support if the patient could not pay and there was no hope of revival, regardless of the patient’s family’s wishes. It is called the Texas Futile Care Law. Under this law, a baby was removed from life support against his mother’s wishes in Texas just this week. A 68 year old man was given a temporary reprieve by the Texas courts just yesterday.
• Republicans have voted en masse to pull the plug (no pun intended) on medicaid funding that pays for the kind of care that someone like Terry Schiavo and many others who are not so severely brain damaged need all across this country.
• Tort reform that is being contemplated by the Republican congress would preclude malpractice claims like that which has paid for Terry Schiavo’s care thus far.
• The Republican bankruptcy bill will make it even more difficult for families who suffer a catastrophic illness like Terry Schiavo’s because they will not be able to declare chapter 7 bankruptcy and get a fresh start when the gargantuan medical bills become overwhelming. (Remember that the majority of people declaring bankruptcy have health insurance.)

Instead, the mainstream media is treating us to “a spectacle on television in which the news anchors repeatedly say that the congress is ’stepping in to save Terry Schiavo’ mimicking the unctuous words of Tom Delay as they grovel and leer at the family and nod sympathetically at the sanctimonious phonies who are using this issue for their political gain. And television is presenting this issue as a round the clock one dimensional soap opera pitting the “family”, the congress and the church against this woman’s husband and the judicial system that upheld Terry Schiavo’s right and explicit request that she be allowed to die if extraordinary means were required to keep her alive.”

(Information found on Daily Kos.)

Anila, Aparna’s 5-year old sister, tasted some of Aparna’s root beer yesterday.

Her analysis?

It takes like bubble gum. Mint bubble gum to be precise.

Upon hearing this, I took a sip. And whaddya know, she’s right.

Last Thursday, Aparna & I went to see a Russell Peters perform at UT. There were about 1,000 people there, and approximately 99% of them were Indian!

The show was hilarious! In fact, Aparna hadn’t laughed that hard since the night I proposed to her.

You should do yourself a favor and check him out when he comes to your city. You can see his upcoming appearances here.

The comedian who opened for Russell, Paul Varghese, was also very funny. Definitely worth keeping an eye on. In fact, he’s even got a blog. What a dork.

So I have set a new record for “longest time between blog entries”. 8 days. Sheesh! I’m concerned some of you might begin to think I’m lazy.

I spent the weekend at work as I needed to catch up on things. It worked out pretty well for Aparna as one of her best friends came to town to visit her. Alison worked with Aparna at Macys, and they became good buddies. I’m sure the fact the fact we can still get a discount at Macys from Alison has nothing to do with why they’ve remained friends.

Not only did I take a few pictures (shocker), but Aparna even took some pictures! She and Alison went to San Antonio on Sunday, and Aparna snapped a few photos. I’ll post them soon.

I haven’t posted many photos since I moved to Austin, and that’s because I don’t really like working with photos on my laptop. We just recently ordered a desk from Workspaces, so hopefully our home office (& thus desktop PC) will be set up soon!

I highly recomend Workspaces. They will design a desk for you, and their have reasonable prices. Here’s what we ended up with (and yes, everyone in the room will have to sit straight up with their arms straight out!):

(click for a larger version)

Well, another busy weekend has come and gone.

Aparna & I went to Houston on Friday, and we spent the night with Roopa, Debasis, and their almost 2-year old son, Millan. I hadn’t seen them in a long time, so it was very fun to catch up. I had a great time playing with Millan, and yes, I do mean playing. I was building race tracks and assembling blocks. It was a little annoying when Millan wanted to use the same toys I was using, but I shared.

On Saturday we met up with Aparna’s family for a puja at a Hindu temple. That’s when my little girl overload officially started. Anila and Neha (Aparna’s 4-year old niece) were there, and I of course could not meet their needs. One thing I learned is when a 4-year old asks you to “play” you do not respond with, “Give me 5 minutes.”

We came back to Austin on Saturday and Aparna’s cousin Roopa came to visit with her two daughters, Malini (6) and Menaka (2.5). I didn’t see them much Saturday night because I went out for “boy’s night out.” (more on that later).

However, on Sunday I had all day to bother the girls. Malini helped me set up my vending machine, and she wanted it done right! We labeled the 4 slots for “Coke,” “Diet Coke,” “Sprite,” and “Caffeine Free Coke.” We correctly filled up the first 3 slots, but when I accidentally brought up “Caffeine Free Diet Coke” for the 4th slot, Malini would have none of that! Since there was no label for that drink, she made me go back downstairs and get the right drink! In an effort to save myself from going up and down the stairs yet again, I tried to explain to her that it would be fun to have people get a different drink than what the label said, but she wasn’t buying it.

Later in the day, Aparna’s cousin Suresh came to pick up Roopa and the girls, and he brought 2 of his girls, Arya (7) and Nina (4). So with 4 little girls around, I was officially in over my head. There was a lot of pink being work, and a lot of giggling at (not with) their Uncle Mo, or “Mohit” as Nina likes to call me.

I did mention earlier that Saturday night was “boy’s night out.” Yep, I went out to get wild and crazy with Rob, Garrett, and Mike. I don’t want to go into all the dirty details, but let’s just say it involved dinner out and playing xbox at Garrett’s. Oh wait, those are all the dirty details. Guess we’re not quite the wild boys we used to be (or think we used to be). To top it off, we were all getting tired by midnight. So just like any brat pack, we …called it a night and went home.

Side note: When contemplating moving back to Texas, I never thought there’d be a weekend where three successive meals would be:

1. vegetarian, south Indian restaurant
2. Bone Daddy’s
3. vegetarian, south Indian restaurant

I’m still getting used to the fact we’re having a girl. Sugar and spice and all things nice. Meanwhile, I’m made of frogs and snails and puppy dog tails. Oh boy.

My next step is to ask Dimple and Rahul’s son, Rohan (who is almost 2 months old), if he will be the “enforcer” for our baby girl. His job will be to beat up boys who look at our girl… for the next 25 years.

Aparna & I went to dinner with Rob, Kelly & Garrett at Berryhill tonight and had a great time. We hadn’t seen them in a while, and it was great to see Garrett and Kelly. I also chatted with Nidhi (who’s in LA) tonight. I mention all of them because they all share the same opinion… that Baby Girl Goyal will walk all over me. Now, I’m not so sure I’ll be the push over everyone thinks I’ll be, but I will say that I’m ok with playing “good cop” to Aparna’s “bad cop.”

Well, it’s official.

We’re having a girl.

Two things:

1. HOW AM *I* GOING TO RAISE A GIRL?!?!
2. PLEASE let her have Aparna’s looks!